Ive been hearing rumours that some of you cats are preparing, training and even making secret alliances way before the game even starts. I thought i should let u know I'm way ahead of you. First of all this isn't survivor Africa or Gabon or Guatelmala its survivor Plainfield and Ive been here almost a year doing research and planning how I am going to win it all. I have studied the terrain, know all the vegitation and have even befriended the little white beast who prowls the area looking for intruders. Ive passed out I mean slept in the elements and last weekend i went to a party with all my neighbors whoops i mean the aboriginals who have laid claim to the land way before i was here. And if that wasn't enough I'm doing the host Stacey Probst. She's promised to make it look good but you guys are done. The only thing left to do is decide who I will take to the final two with me. I'm thinkin Sarah cause she's small and when the food gets low I won't have to share as much. Plus she's damn funny and those last desparate days when i'm fading away from malnourishment at least we can make fun of each other to pass the time by. There is some definate threats out there though. If it came down to Barb and I in the final two then wow I can't even imagine. I heard that a spoiled young lady who went to a private art school is in the contest as well I'd tell you what I have in store for her but i don't want to scare her off.
On a more serious note last Saturday i was mowing the lawn and damn was it hot. I peeled my shirt off then did a few more laps and i couldn't take it anymore so i went to the fridge opened it up and to my horror there was no beer. How could this have happened i thought when way in the back hidden with the girly drinks (mikes hard lemonade...sorry Jim) was a Bud light lime. Was this a mirage no its true Donna had left it behind on her last visit. So i popped the top and man was it refreshing but after the first drink I began to realize the problem was still there this was the last beer. I thought about it for a minute and decided the only way to enjoy it was to pretend that it was Donna's last beer instead of mine and it worked great i even giggled as i took the last sip . Well i think ive stirred up enough shit for today, can't wait to see you all.
I think you should have a daily column somewhere! Daily by Dusty? Has a nice ring! As for the girl who went to a private art school... I believe that reference is intended for me... let me tell ya something, BRING IT. I am ready. I have a secret alliance. We are lethal. Even if we are on a different team, we know our plan and we'll be Victorious! I will write more later. Currently I am busy diffusing the paparazzi. They are all a buzz with the news that my husband and I are adopting a baby from china... so Hollywood eh?
ReplyDeleteLove you all, have a great day!
xo
OK Richard...please promise not to get naked!
ReplyDeleteYou may be "doing the host" but that is not going to help you in the finals. You and your little white beast are on the menu for our celebration dinner.
As for competition, the Over 45's, including Dominating Donna and Kevin Krusher, plan to kick butt! Remember, we have experience and strategic planning on our side. You may know the terrain but we know how the minds of our children work and you guys don't stand a chance!
On the other hand, if I happen to have a few 'youngsters' on my team, I will be happy to teach them all I know about messing with the minds of the locals.
Looking forward to Survivor Plainfield!
Bring your beer and watch your back!!!!
xo
I will lie, cheat and steal your babies if i have to, to win this game. look out - sneaky sarah is planning her attack! tim , i eat more than you might think...but I appreciate the final two offer. we just need to break the rest of the goons down and take 'em off, one by one. we'll talk more later, i don't want to say too much.
ReplyDeleteover'n'out
Well now, lets all remember that i have lived in Australia....(a short time...lol) but am aware of being in the "out back". Im bigger, stronger, and more determined to go out of the country with this under my belt! Go out with a bang! So be aware..... I now see how you all work.... lying, cheating and "doing" to get ahead....but remember, my sidekick may be very small ( not Sarah) but she has attitude and looks that can kill!
ReplyDeleteSee you all soon!
Sierrah is the first person I plan to take off the island...I am RUTHLESS! Kids, seniors, the disabled- they're all fair game to me!
ReplyDeleteyou get rid of kids, seniors and the disabled and you're playing alone honey!
ReplyDeleteI believe half the game IS seniors Sarah so be careful... Maybe us babies should stick together....a little more agile and on top of our game?!?!?! Im willing to take out Sierrah first too, she might drag us down a bit. SHe is getting pretty heavy! And she still seeems to have a problem urinating everywhere so that would leave a scent....and for those who are or have begun to lose one sence...(hearing) that might be hightened.........ooooohhhhhh nnnnnoooooo
ReplyDeleteSurvivor Plainfield..Richard Hatch..LAST BUD LIME LIGHT!!!..I left that beer there for a reason..and you were not it! giggle if you will...cry you definately will...little do you know that that terrain you have come to call yours, was mine before you were born..i have travelled that area many times only to know that one day I would return..the day has come!!
ReplyDeleteThe Dominator...........
someone has to carry your "minnie me" might as well be you Richard
ReplyDeletehmmmmmm
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